Suppress = Numb?

I'm sure everyone of you have suppress your feelings for certain things or certain feelings. Hoping it will go away after sometime. But have you ever wonder did that suppressed feeling really go away? or already become numb? When it's numb, you will only be immune to that certain feelings. When the same feelings you come across again, you won't be able to fully feel it again. I probably sound like I'm just jabbering stuff, but you get what I mean right?

Let's break it down to what most of you could relate to - love. Don't really care what are the situations but it will just end up you being forbidden from loving that person. What most of you do? Give up? Still hope that you could with be that person in the mere future(somehow, people will always like to hang on to forbidden love cos what you can't end up with will always seems to be the best)? Whatever the answer is, in the mean time, you do have to suppress your feelings for that person, right? And as time pass, the feelings you suppress will just being push behind you day by day. Probably, will end up having numb feelings. It's funny that our brain/heart could block up those hurtful feelings to protect ourselves from being hurt again. Somehow, you kinda forgot what really happen but having to be a person with a zombie heart. (Same page with me yet?)

 When you have numb feelings, you tend to miss out on the coming love which probably will happen in the future. But your brain/heart blocks you from it. You probably would be able to truly feel how great of the love that the future lover is giving to you, right? You probably will end up with a empty heart which is full of loneliness. So my question is does most of you experience such? Does suppressing your feelings will end up to numbness? Will you suppress too much or too deep that somehow one day you'll EXPLODE?

Been pretty stress lately, that's why such *useless/boring* thoughts go through my head. I'm suppressing my pressure for work. It's kinda hard cos I end up getting very jumpy and having hard time sleeping. Another thing is that, I've been suppressing the true person that I am. I don't know why but maybe I'm too concern on what people think of me. I think I'm starting to have those perfectionist sickness. *need help* Though, I'm starting to let lose myself bit by bit. I probably will shock some (sort of, cos known for quite some time already) new friends of who I really am. I feel the evil/rebellious side of me is getting lose. Is it a good thing? *Being emo now*

My Current Playlist

UPDATED: Can someone tell me how to edit the size of the video so that it won't just appear half of it here. I'm sry for the unpleasant viewing.

When I saw my current playlist is not songs from gadgets. It's actually songs in my head and erm...youtube. To be honest, I never own any music gadget. Not even a walkman during the dinosaurs decade! I always wanted one but either is too expensive or there's always other gadgets that slide my mind away from it. Of course, for now we have youtube! and the more tradition ones - radio. It really is a savior while you were driving and stuck in MASSIVE jam!!!!!! *hate that*

Anyway, my current fav songs that I have to listen to are these..... I don't know why but they just keep replaying in my head! I guess, I can entertain myself! *lame*



Lady Antebellum - Need You Now
OMFG! I totally fallen in ♥ with this song when the very first time I heard it from American Idol Season 9! It's just so so so addictive! Their live version is just as good as the normal version. This is what we call good vocals. No matter live or not live, your voice sounds the same or better then you are really good! I just like this song a lot! It just a bitter sweet song where you miss a person so much that you really want them in your arms like NOW! 





Will Young - Leave Right Now
Everything when someone from AI 9 leave and they will show videos of previous memories of the kick out, and there's this song which sound sooo good and even I don't really like the kick out, every time I'll get tear up! It just the perfect song for such sad ending. So it's obvious that this is a sad song *duh* I always wanted to know the title of the song and the singer but didn't get to know until they invited Will to sing at the finale of AI 9. The performance was just great! I teared up so much! *cry* and I finally get to know who.t.h sing this song! Btw, he's the winner of Pop Idol!

Christina Aguilera You Lost Me

Well, well, well... I can't say is this a come back album or not cos her first single - Not Myself Tonight was not very impressing for me. But her performance from AI 9 just blew my mind off! This song is really really really amazing! I think she's the only that could sing this song! Thought I think else bout her outfit for the performance. LOL This song just reminds me of how good of a singer that she is, she really is born with a beautiful voice but I don't know why she move to the WILD side of her which just so blah... 

Crystal Bowersox - Up To The Mountain

This song is really really emo for me and Crystal! She just sings her heart out in this song, so emotional! This song really suits her voice and her uniqueness a lot too. Don't think people sing songs like this anymore. *teary through out the whole song* I really hope she get this song recorded and put it in her album, I am SO! gonna buy it! Ok, I know, I know, the playlist is all from AI 9 but I didn't really want it to be like this, it just happened that all songs and artists did performance in AI 9. I didn't really watch much of AI except for season 1 and season 9. These are the seasons that I watched fully. When I say fully it means from audition to the finale. The other seasons I just skipped watch or just watch the finale. Coincidentally, this is the first season for Ellen to join in as judge and Simon's last season. It's like I watch the beginning and the end of AI. Well, it's not the end of AI but Simon is gone so I don't think it will be that good to watch cos I personally thinks Simon's critic or suggestions are really professional right. I do secretly like Simon LOL! I do think Crystal is a winner from day one already cos she's just so unique! I continually watch this season because of her, is just sad that she didn't win, but anyway, she 100% definitely get sign to publish an album! She SANG with Alanis Morissette!!!! How cool it is! *screaming my lungs out!*

 

Kina Grannis - World In Front Of Me

I got to know her from wongfuproductions which I will be talking about on my coming entry. Let's talk bout Kina first. She just look so sweet and her voice is sweet too. She does write her own songs. So please do support her. You can subscribe to her, here Check out her official single - Valentine♥♥♥ The video is cute too and a lot of effort is put in it. Finally a happier song in my playlist?! wtf Am I that emo? I'm just sentimental? hahhaa... I don't think I need to say much about Kina's voice and this song cos you just get it instantly. It's a good morning song too if you know your day will be tough, so you can unFYL temporarily. 

 

David Choi - That Girl

 This is a song about a guy who gives up or force to not love the girl of his life. It's just a bitter bitter song and situation where you are in denial for loving a person or to suppress your feelings for a person. It kinda also like admirers where they can't voice out their feelings. Please stick to watch until the end of the video cos I think the ending is so freaking amazing! Love the video lotzzzz..... David is talented as well and I got to know this song from wongfuproductions too. 

~ END ~

★★★ Hope you guys enjoyed my playlist.